


leave me be

by yugycum



Category: GOT7
Genre: Depression, M/M, Sad, just full sadness, sad yugyeom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-11-07 20:39:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11066697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yugycum/pseuds/yugycum
Summary: when jinyoung woke up one morning, he didnt expect to find the bed beside him cold and his lover missing





	leave me be

jinyoung woke up to the sound of rain lightly hitting the window, a scream of wind emitting itself around the bedroom. he grumbled. he never particularly liked stormy weather, almost finding that it dampened his mood along with the trees and soil outside, but oh how much his boyfriend loved the rain. 

his lover, loved the way the rain droplets lightly freckled his cheeks and forehead, he loved the way his hair would blow slightly in the wind. he adored the way the plants and trees seemed to nourish with the wet weather and how animals found their way back to their homes to retreat for the day, peacefully waiting for the storm to dissapear. 

but his most favourite was how warm he felt, oh how warm he felt lying in his boyfriends arms on days like this, arms gently wrapped around his waist, soft hands rubbing his back lovingly as they both lay imersed in whatever romantic movie they both decided to put on, which always ended up in jinyoung carrying his boyfriend to bed.

yugyeom loved the rain.

but today, today was different. jinyoung felt cold, he didnt have the warm blanket of his boyfriend. he reached out, but warm skin was nowhere to be found. jinyoung sighed, assuming that yugyeom must of woken up early and decided to let jinyoung sleep in. he heard light rustling coming from the kitchen in the dorm which seemed to prove himself right. he smiled. 

he slowly got up, ruffling his hands through his hair after slipping a t-shirt on, he yawned, bringing his hands up and giving himself small slaps on his face to help get him out of his sleepy daze. he pulled his plain white slippers on, some bits torn around the edges due to coco getting a hold of them. 

he walked out of his and yugyeoms room, passing by bambam who was sprawled out in his bed. he had a lot more room now that yugyeom had moved himself into jinyoungs room. he joined yugyeoms old bed and his together, giving him a huge double bed all to himself. all of the boys knew that the two boys were a thing, they agreed to keep it quiet and to let it be, as long as it didnt effect the group in any way. 

the smell of cooking hit his senses as he opened the door, jinyoung quietly walked into the kitchen, the floor boards creaking under every step he took. he noticed jaebum standing at the fridge, pulling out ingredients needed for everybodys breakfast.

'morning hyung' jinyoung breathed out as he looked around for any sign of his boy. jaebum whipped around, holding a hand up to his heart in an exasperated way 'jinyoung you scared me, dont sneak up on me like that again' he shouted. 

trying to calm himself down he grabbed the small tub of kimchi before shutting the fridge. 'sorry, hey have you seen gyeomie anywhere? i thought he would of been in here with you?' he explained as he pulled a chair out from the dining table, slumping down in the seat and holding his head in his hands. he heard a quiet 'nuh uh' from jaebum before he continued 'i thought he was still in bed with you? i havent seen him at all this morning'.

jinyoung sat, he sat and thought of all the possibilities of where his lover could be. he wondered, wondered where his boy is hiding.

jinyoung grabbed his phone and quickly dialed yugyeoms number, it rang and rang, but there wasnt an answer. 'maybe hes at practice' jinyoung wondered. he wouldnt be surprised, even though its one of their rare days off, yugyeom still wants to work his body to the limit, he works hard for his hyungs and for the fans, never wanting to let anyone down. this caused a massive weight to hang over yugyeoms head, and jinyoung knew about it. 

there was days when yugyeom couldnt deal with the stress and responsibilty of being in the group, he'd come home from shows, quietly slip into his room and not come out for the whole night. he wouldnt eat, he wouldnt drink, but most worryingly, he wouldnt speak. hed keep it all inside, dealing with his problems on his own, but now he has jinyoung and jinyoung knows when its one of those days for the younger. he can tell by the way his eyes droop a little bit more, how the bags under his eyes are a light shade of blue and purple. 

he could tell by his eyes, his eyes held so much emotion and jinyoung could read them perfectly. on his bad days, his eyes didnt have the bright cheeky shine they usually have, his eyes are dull looking, almost glazed over in a fog of depression, and jinyoung hates seeing the love of his life suffering.

jinyoung quickly stood up, panic beginning to settle in the pit of his stomach, he left the kitchen in a hurry, leaving jaebum confused at his sudden departure. he walked towards the bathroom door, the gentle flow of water and the hum of the bathroom fan could be heard clearly from outside the bathroom door, jinyoung let out a sigh of relief, 'he must be having a shower' he thought as he lightly knocked on the bathroom door. 

'gyeom?' but there was no answer. 

'yugyeom are you in there?' the concerned boy shouted, he heard fumbling, bottles getting knocked over as the so presumed yugyeom climbed out of the shower. the door whipped open, only for jinyoung to find jackson standing in the door way, a light brown towel wrapped around his waist. he looked displeased, most likely due to the fact that jinyoung cut his shower time short. 

jinyoung stepped back, worry finally taking over his body as he realised, yugyeom isnt home. mumbling a short 'sorry' to jackson, he bolted into his bedroom. grabbing a jacket and cap from the closet, he quickly slipped on some shoes and grabbed a set of keys before shouting a panicked 'im going to the grocery store', the door slamming behind him. 

\----------------

jinyoung had been in the cars for hours, having to stop over at a gas station at one point because the car run out of gas. the first place he visited was the practice room, but the tall and lanky boy was no where to be seen.

nearing 6pm, roughly 8 missed calls from jaebum and the other members, but he didnt bother to answer them, too invested in finding the love of his life. due to it being winter, the night sky rises earlier in the day, so it comes as no surprise to jinyoung that the sun has almost fully set at 6pm, the street lights flickering on and the buildings and restaurants emitting a tan glow onto the main streets.

not many people were walking around, the rain still gently falling onto the car's window. jinyoung let out a breath, a loud beeping noise coming from the front of the car, notifying jinyoung that he needed to fill up the gas tank again, but he had no money. 

he decided to head back home, hoping that yugyeom will already be safe and sound at the dorm. jinyoung hoped that when he returns back, he'll walk into his and yugyeoms room and find the younger wrapped up in blankets, sleeping quietly as soft snores escape his lips, hoping that the younger is getting the rest he fully deserves. 

as he turned the car around in an empty parking lot, the sound of his phone rang through the silent car. he gently stopped the car, looking down at his phone to find yet another call from jaebum but this time jinyoung answered. 

'hyung' jinyoung managed to say before he heard the sound of shuffling and yelling coming from the opposites telephone. 'jinyoungie, please get home now, yugyeoms showed up and he isnt- he isnt good please jinyoungie get home quickly' jinyoung could faintly hear crying, he could hear bambams voice releasing high pitched screams, but before jinyoung could reply the phone line went dead.

\-------------

jinyoung drove home fast, not caring about the set driving speed or the fact that he was driving way to fast for it to be legal. his hands gripped the steering wheel tightly as he came up to the dorm, he pulled the car into the garage, quickly unbuckling his seatbelt and cutting off the engine of the car. he hopped out in a rush, slamming the car door shut and not even bothering to lock it. 

he ran up to the front door of the dorm, fumbling with his keys he managed to enter it into the lock, twisting the key and successfully unlocking it. jinyoung ran, he ran so fast to reach his boy. he didnt know what room they were in, but that didnt matter because he heard the yelling coming from jaebums room. 

once he reached jaebums room he burst the door open, coming across a scene jinyoung has dreaded to see again. yugyeom was laying on the floor, his head was resting in jaebums lap whilst mark was at his side. jinyoung scanned yugyeom up and down, the boy was pale, almost the colour of chalk. 

he was shirtless with blood covering his arms along with deep gashes. he was slipping to and from consciousness, but he managed to look up at jinyoung. he looked up at jinyoung and frowned, before closing his eyes and letting a sob release itself from his throat. he started to cry, his body trembled with every hiccup and cry that escaped him. jinyoung walked in slowly, dropping to his knees beside his lover before wrapping his arms around the youngers body. 

he carefully pulled yugyeom up, picking him up like a baby and carrying him towards the bathroom. the others were in shock at the calmness jinyoung radiated, but jinyoung has witnessed this before, he knew what to do. as the others stood up to follow, jaebum stopped them, telling them to 'leave it to jinyoung, he knows what to do'.

they both entered the bathroom, jinyoung carefully set yugyeom on the toilet, too aftraid that if he touches him too roughly the boy will break into so many pieces. he leaned over the bathtub, putting the plug in and running the hot water. he poured some bubble bath liquid underneath the flowing water which caused the bath to be covered in small little bubbles. as the water was running jinyoung walked over to the sink and soaked a cloth under luke warm water, he gently ringed it out and walked over to yugyeom who was still sat seated on the toilet. 

jinyoung bent down to yugyeoms level, giving his a kiss on his forehead, he then continued to carefully wipe over the deep gashes and cuts that are scattered over yugyeoms undeserving arms. he tried to clean his arms as best as he could and yugyeom was so good for jinyoung. 

once the bath was the perfect temperature jinyoung stopped the water flow and pulled yugyeom off the toilet seat. his shirt had already been removed so jinyoung quickly unbuttoned the youngers jeans. he pulled them down, lifting yugyeoms legs one after the other so he can carefully climb out of the tight jeans. he stood clad in his black boxer shorts, tear stains on his cheeks and he sniffled silently. jinyoung felt nothing but sadness course its way through his body.

yugyeom didnt deserve this, yugyeom didnt deserve the pain and suffering, hes only 19, he should be living his life to the most instead of wanting to end it so soon. jinyoung gently gripped the youngers boxers, sliding them down his legs. 

once the boxers were off, jinyoung speedily undressed himself before walking yugyeom towards the bath that was filling the room with a vanilla scent, yugyeoms favourite. jinyoung climbed in first, slowly sinking into the warmth as bubbles covered him like a blanket. he grabbed yugyeoms hand and pulled him carefully into the bath, letting the younger lie back against his chest. yugyeom let out a sigh of relief, the water releasing all of the tension that was built up in his muscles. 

'im sorry hyung' yugyeom whispered out and jinyoung just tutted as an answer. he grabbed the small cup sitting on the edge of the bath tub, dipping it into the bath to collect all the water before slowly pouring over yugyeoms head, wetting his hair. he repeated this process once more before grabbing the shampoo and squirting a bit into his hand. jinyoung gently rubbed the shampoo onto yugyeoms scalp, massaging it all in to his greasy locks. another sigh escaped the youngers lips which caused jinyoung to smile ever so slightly. 

after jinyoung had rinsed the shampoo out of yugyeoms hair, he gently pushed yugyeom forward so he was sitting forward. jinyoung quickly got out of the bath and climbed back in again but he was sitting infront of yugyeom instead. they stared at eachother for a while and jinyoung was able to see the hurt behind yugyeoms eyes. 

jiyoung grabbed the body puff and layered body wash onto it, he carefully scrubbed at yugyeoms frail body starting at his chest and finishing at the bottom of his legs. neither of them spoke for a while, they connected their hands at some point and didnt let eachothers hands go. they both sat and enjoyed eachother presense, but it wasnt long before jinyoung broke the silence. 

'why? why did you do it again gyeom, you promised me! you promised me that you would stop hurting yourself!' jinyoung exclaimed, he didnt want to raise his voice too much but he was truly heartbroken at the fact that his lover put himself through this again. 'where did you even go? i was looking for you for hours yugyeom, fucking hours! why do you keep doing this.' he couldnt stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks, the thought of losing yugyeom circling his mind. 

yugyeom sat in silence as he played with the bubbles that were slowly starting to dissapear. he hurt, his arms hurt, his heart hurt but he didnt care about the pain he was feeling. he hated that he made jinyoung hurt. soft sniffles came from jinyoung as he slowly collected himself, he had to be strong for yugyeom. 

'i just want a normal life hyung please' yugyeoms voice breaking in the process, making him sound weaker than he ever has before. 'i want to live a normal happy life with you hyung, i dont want to keep on hiding 'us'. jinyoungie i love you so much but i cant keep on pretending that we arent a thing'.

yugyeom burst into tears, his head falling forward and his back hunching as he let out loud sobs. jinyoung reached forward, quickly pulling yugyeoms head into his chest, the younger nuzzling his face into the crook of the elders neck, a few 'shh's' coming from jinyoung as the youngers crying became louder. 

a few minutes later and his crying slowly started to quieten down, causing jinyoung to gently pull yugyeoms head away from the crook of his neck. yugyeom looked up at him with broken eyes and before he knew it jinyoung was pulling him into a kiss. they kissed slowly, lips matching eachother perfectly, tongues fighting for dominance. jinyoung took over in the end as he gently laid yugyeom back against the bathtub and deepened the kiss. the younger wrapped his arms around the elders neck, trying to pull jinyoung in as much as possible. 'i love you so much baby boy' jinyoung breathed out in between the kiss. he could practically feel yugyeoms cheeks heat up at the nickname he loved so much. 

they broke apart, soft tears falling from yugyeoms eyes as he stared up at the man he had fallen deeply in love with. jinyoung smiled down at him, bringing a hand up and wiping away the tears he no longer wanted to see. he wanted to see his lover smile, not cry. 

jinyoung quickly clambered out of the bath and pulled yugeom out after him. the older dressed the younger in a baby pink oversized sweater and yugyeoms favourite shorts (which were originally jinyoungs) before he messily dressed himself into his favourite shorts and black t-shirt. 

the pair left the bathroom quietly and both walked to the kitchen. as they entered the kitchen they came across the other members sitting around the dining table. jaebum looked up and his eyes immediately flashed worry as he stood up and walked towards the maknae. 'is everything okay?' he questioned as he looked the boy up and down. yugyeom quietly nodded his head as he stared at the floor. he felt awful that he put all of his best friends through this, nothing but guilt coursed through his body. 

jaebum gently grabbed the sleeve of yugyeoms sweater before slowly pulling it up and revealing all the deep cuts and previous scars. he inhaled so deeply that everybody in the room could hear it. he stared at the youngers arm before leaning down and giving light kisses above the cuts that were healing over. he carefully pulled the sleeve back down, covering the scars like a plaster 

'i think its time you and jinyoung tell everyone, even if it risks the group your health and safety is much more important. i cant see you hurting like this gyeom, we love you so much and we cant lose you' the leader said as he glanced between the two boyfriends. 

yugyeom heard quiet hums of approval from the table behind jaebum, the other members supporting the decision of the leader. he looked at jinyoung who had a smile plastered on his face. they both hugged eachother, sobs once again leaving yugyeoms body. jinyoung rubbing his hand up and down the youngers back slowly in a reasuring way. but the tears he was crying were different, they were happy tears. 

the other members ran over to the two boys as they all gathered in for a group hug. some of the boys who yugyeom wasnt quiet sure of kissed his head and held his hands as a show of support and love.

yugyeom looked up and smiled, ready to tell the world that him and jinyoung are so madly in love with eachother

**Author's Note:**

> i hope everyone enjoyed this sad ass fic, please leave comments and kudos!!


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